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Monday, July 14, the Winona Daily News’ Peanuts cartoon (my favorite) showed Lucy looking out the window saying, “What is so rare as a day in June?” Charlie Brown, snuggled in his bean chair, says, “This is July.” Sister responds, “What is so rare as a day in June and you missed it again.”
If you slept through English class when we read these lines:
“And what is so rare as a day in June?
Then if ever come perfect days.”
I need to remind you that those lines are by James Russell Lowell. He penned those lines as part of a very lo-o-o-n-g poem, “The Vision of Sir Launfel” which is all about a search for the Holy Grail.
That portion of the longer poem is a rhapsodic tribute to the beauties of nature and for some mischievous reason inspired me as a youngster to write my very own version. Here it is in print for the very first time.
“And what is so rare as a day in June
As old man Callahan’s brass spitoon.
It stinks so bad and smells so strong —
It’ll knock a man down if he stands around long.”
Whatever possessed me to do mayhem with those lovely lines, I’ll never know, but there’s a story behind this. (Probably doesn’t make it any more acceptable). My Mom was a sub in the Minneiska post office. The postmaster was a kindly old gent (about my present age!) by the name of Callahan. This was the time in history (1930s) when brass spittoons were provided for the chewers in our midst. Apparently spittoon contents ripened with age and left a strong impression on my childish nose/mind.
To clear my conscience I apologize to James Russell Lowell and any descendants of the Callahan family. There, I feel better.
That said, obviously I am not entering the sonnet contest. Poet Laureate James Armstrong can relax — I didn’t even attend the seminars for participation. Not that I find it not to my liking, but every time I try my hand at poetry, it turns to doggerel. I loved the Burma-Shave signs and maybe they influenced my poetry. The signs came in a series of four with Burma-Shave credited for them on the fifth sign. Remember these:
“Listen, Birds These signs cost money So roost awhile But don’t get funny.” — Burma-Shave”
“The place to pass On curves You know Is only at A beauty show. — Burma-Shave”
“If your peach Keeps out of reach Better practice — What we preach — Burma-Shave”
“His cheek Was rough — His chick vamoosed — And now she won’t — Come home to roost — Burma-Shave”
“When Super-shaved — Remember, pard — You’ll still get slapped — But not so hard — Burma-Shave”
“The whale — Put Jonah — Down the Hatch — But coughed him up — Because he scratched — Burma-Shave”
“Burma-Shave — Was such a boom — They passed The bride — And kissed the groom”
“Violets are blue n Roses are pink — On Graves — Of those — Who drive and drink — Burma-Shave”
“On curves ahead — Remember, sonny — That rabbit’s foot — Didn’t save — The bunny — Burma-Shave”
“A guy — Who drives — A car wide open — Is not thinkin” — He’s just hopin’ — Burma-Shave”
“To kiss — A mug — That’s like a cactus — Takes more nerve — Than it does practice — Burma-Shave”
“Her chariot — Raced 80 per — They hauled away — What had — Ben Her — Burma-Shave”
Remember them? Most touted the benefits of using their line of products (are they still around?) but many had safe driving messages.
Info from Google: In 1925 Allen Odell suggested the idea of the signs to his father, the owner of Burma-Shave, who not wild about the idea, relented and gave his son $200 to try out the idea. “It didn’t take long for sales to soar. Soon Allen and his brother Leonard were putting up signs all over the place.” At the height of this endeavor there were 7,000 signs recognizable by their white print on red background.
Not only did we enjoy finding them along the roadside but it was great fun to compose our own. That’s probably where I missed my calling. Doggerel I can do but for sonnets I surely disqualify myself.
“Your readership — I appreciate — Twenty-nine columns — up to this date — Katie Buck”
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